Most U.S. Cocaine Laced With Money
This woman found almost a thousand dollars contaminating her cocaine
Sixth T. Nonsense, Anonymous Press
(BALTIMORE) Traces of paper money taint up to 90% of cocaine in the United States, a new study finds.
A group of scientists tested eight-balls from more than 30 cities in five countries, including the United States, Canada, Brazil, China, and Japan, and found “alarming” evidence of paper currency use in many areas.
U.S. cocaine had the highest levels, with an average contamination rate between $5 to $25, while Canadian cocaine was typically contaminated with what appeared to be very colorful, but completely useless Monopoly Money.
Study leader Ling Ling of the University of Massajewsetts in Dartmonth said that the high percentage of contaminated U.S. cocaine observed in the current study represents nearly a $20 jump in comparison to a similar study he conducted two years ago.
“To my surprise, we’re finding more and more banknotes in cocaine. We all thought that the government’s “War on Economy” put a stop to paper currency well over a year ago.” Ling said.
Scientists have known for years that cocaine can become contaminated with paper money during visits to Gentleman’s club and directly through money use, like when ordering pizza or Chinese food. Contamination can also spread to cocaine not involved in the illicit currency culture, because cocaine is often used in bank’s across the country. In fact, scientists speculate that the majority of the recent Bank Bailout went directly towards subsidizing the purchase of more cocaine.
“I’m not sure why we’ve seen this apparent increase, but it could be related to the economic downturn, with credit opportunities dwindling, people are turning to cash more and more often,” Ling said.
Such studies are useful, he noted, because the data can help Treasury analysts and IRS auditors identify patterns of currency use in a community.
Previous studies that have reported on traces of money in cocaine have had several drawbacks, Ling said. Some only sampled a small amount, while others destroyed the cocaine in the process of testing.
Ling and his colleagues used a modified instrument that allowed for faster, simpler and more accurate measurement of contamination than other methods, without destroying the precious cocaine.
The amounts of U.S. bills found in cocaine ranged from $1 to more than $100 per gram of cocaine.
The scientists found that larger cities like Baltimore, Boston, and Detroit had among the highest average cocaine levels. Washington, D.C., ranked above the average, with 95 percent of coked out politicians contaminated with cash. The lowest average U.S. currency levels appeared in cocaine collected from Detroit.
Despite the high percentage of banknote contaminated cocaine, Ling points out that the amount of money found in most samples was so small that consumers should not have any health or legal concerns about accidentally handling paper currency.
“For the most part, you can get high by sniffing most cocaine,” Ling said. “but if you can manage to get your hands on some really pure shit, it probably won’t even affect your health or interfere with blood or urine tests or anything for like more than a week or two or three or maybe even four weeks out.”
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